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| i miss you
but i dun know you will know it or even care about it
i sent you an email but you didnt reply me!
might be you are busy ....
but i still hope you are doing well
take care dear!
im still thinking of you!
jason
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| um.... am i enjoying my summer holiday so far?,,,... maybe Yes
oh well... i need to talk to you my old friend.! i feel so lonely tonight without someone's support!
I am listening 'Once' sound track over and over again.... and i feel like i am dying slowly......
xanga do you think I broke up with kathi... i mean kathrin was a very bad choice?...if yes... but it was my choice tho and why I am feeling so sad at the moment then? I feel so sad as just my heart broke or someone just die.
I think no one would understand what i feel at the moment.
I want her so much!!!!! i could give up my university for her spend all my money on her and do everything i can to her...
I just wanna say good morning to my little baby when i get up, i just want to kiss her when i get up, i just want to see her when i first wake up!
but everything seems a dream. never come true.
Love is a killer.
anD..
Distance is a Love's Killer...........
I put my roses in front of the door, then ring the bell.....
But
no one come to answer the door.!!!!!
Love x
Jason
9-June-2009
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| She seems GONE forever!
she drew a cross in our relationship!.... I cun fix it again at all
I hope she is nothing....... nothing matter to me at all , BUT
She is my EVERYTHING!
I don't hope this kind of old Polices man can give her any happiness!!!
I Hate that I still love her!
What a Witch! ...................................
heard there was a secret chord
that david played and it pleased the lord
but you don't really care for music, do you
well it goes like this the fourth, the fifth
the minor fall and the major lift
the baffled king composing hallelujah
hallelujah...
well your faith was strong but you needed proof
you saw her bathing on the roof
her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
she tied you to her kitchen chair
she broke your throne and she cut your hair
and from your lips she drew the hallelujah
hallelujah...
baby i've been here before
i've seen this room and i've walked this floor
i used to live alone before i knew you
i've seen your flag on the marble arch
but love is not a victory march
it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
hallelujah...
well there was a time when you let me know
what's really going on below
but now you never show that to me do you
but remember when i moved in you
and the holy dove was moving too
and every breath we drew was hallelujah
well, maybe there's a god above
but all i've ever learned from love
was how to shoot somebody who outdrew you
it's not a cry that you hear at night
it's not somebody who's seen the light
it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
hallelujah...
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| Hi my Xanga, I have no one I can send an Email to... only You my baby Xanga! :)
Guess what my baby xanga...I found a very good song for me today! match my feeling so perfectly!
Its a song called 'Nothing Lasts forever' by Maroon 5
Lyrics following by:
It is so easy to see
Dysfunction between you and me
*We must free up these tired souls
*Before the sadness kills us both
*I tried and tried to let you know
*I love you but I'm letting go
*It may not last but I don't know
*Just don't know
If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you
Everyday
With every word whispered
*We get more far away
*The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
*And nothing lasts forever,
*But be honest babe
*It hurts but it may be the only way
*A bed that's warm with memories
*Can heal us temporarily
The misbehaving only makes
The ditch between us so damn deep
*Built a wall around my heart
*I'll never let it fall apart
*But strangely I wish secretly
*It would fall down while I'm asleep
If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you, babe
Everyday
With every word whispered
We get more far away
*The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
*And nothing lasts forever,
*But be honest babe
*It hurts but it may be the only way
*Though we have not hit the ground
*It doesn't mean we're not still falling,
***Oh I want so bad to pick you up
***But you're still too
***Reluctant to accept my help
***What a shame, I hope you
***Find somewhere to place
***The blame,
***But until then the fact remains...
[Chorus]
Everyday
With every word whispered
*We get more far away
*The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
*Nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
*It hurts but it may be the only way
Everyday
With every worthless word
*We get more far away
*The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
*And nothing lasts forever,
*But be honest babe
*It hurts but it may be the only way
* means I like those lyrics...more * means totally like it :)
xanga is my time to tell you what have I done 2day!
I was so upset last night so I could not sleep till 4 this morning!
I fell in sleep slowly.... just remind me a song.... falling slowly...blablabla :P
anyway I decided not going to University today, and meet up with Isabelle, Emily and Emily's friend :)
We went to the part for my lunch or whatever it was lol!
We took a lot of pictures of them today :) that I love to do this so much :) because they always smile :)
They bought me a Donut that I do not feel like eating it cos its all fat! ha ha specially I am still not in the mood to eat anything yet... I might turn to skiny people soon lol :P
I spend more than 2 hours in there then went to shopping and walk around in London during the dark night :)
I love it! cos its quiet and very beautiful... specially I was walking with 3 hot girls you know! how romantic is that :) HEHE
then we went to Nandos for dinner...OMG!!! EAT AGAIN....
They push me ate 2 Chickens and lots Chips.... I feel so sick now! lol!
My day was good! I got a lot of text and messages for my friends :) I can see they care about me so much!
I love people who care about me! and specially take a action to do it! :) sweet !
My brain was quite EMTY today! just can not think of anything...
everything just coming and going to quick! I do not have to time to think about it carefully and some how just can not breath! I did not show that in front of anyone! But I have to tell you my baby xanga! otherwise I will go crazy! :)
What is the Difference between in relationship and single for me so far!?!?!
Not much difference for me! Still got Uni everyday! still meet up with friends every weekend
still have to sleep, still have to get up, still got a bad dream
and still... have to send an Email... but this time is to you my baby xanga! and basically is to ME - Jason - myself!
I thought my yesterday was a DREAM! But unfortunately it was not a DREAM, it was a real happen :(
my friend told me " Jason! Time still passing every sec. and your life is still going! what a waiting for?!'
oh well... My answer is...I do not know! JUST DON'T KNOW! :) how simply... typical Jason isn't it!
I was Single and I was happy and unhappy about I was Single
I was in love and I was happy and upset with I was in love
Now I am Single again!.... This happen just keep going and going in my life! never stop!
I have to accept!
It is 2:51 am here now baby xanga!
I have go to sleep and carry on my new day tomorrow!
P.S.
Should I look back? or carry on my life and never go back again?
I call you - xanga is baby...cos I do not have baby who i called anymore! Xanga is my self - is Jason - is my baby
Kiss Your hand Jason... JUST kiss it! Would make you feeling better - said by JoJo Ladds
Jason xxx
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| How many people are break up in this day? I don't know...
But at least I know I am one of them
In this world, one the Earth have a lots happen going on...
People born, People die, People Happy, Or... People just like me...
Can not believe this happen again... no one ever told me when I will finish this but at least I knew it when it's over.
I fell upset but at least it's over.
Love is all about happy, and Upset
anyway no one need to feel sorry for me, cos break up once is foolish my self, Break up twice is foolish your self, Brake up again... is foolish ourself!
I was thinking about my life!
I was the lucky one because I was the happy one :)
I still believe if i carry with this relationship that will never end! Cos it just doesn't work!
Time is passing every sec. Life is still going and people are still growing! :)
I feel happy for Kathrin because we had together, we been in love, and She found her way and she found her LOVE
I got a drawing for her for our own Valentine day gift!
But... It's whatever already....
People kept telling me Ex Lover can never be a Best Friend.... But i did not think so
So now... maybe is a tiny hard for me to be a Friend anymore!
Every Time I see her is in my Holiday, normally every 2 or 3 months... but this holiday seems very far away!!!
When is my next holiday for me to see her? Maybe is.....next Century....
Maybe lover could be forever on somebody else... but unfortunately It's never happen on me
Uptown Girl and Downtown Man are never match!
Might be I took your heart and break it once! But i swear it wont happen again....
Because this pain wont stay with you forever....
Good Bye ...........my BIG Lover!!!!
Good Bye to you my trusted friend
We know each other since 2008
Together we were climbed boarding house and singing on the sixth from common room :)
Learned of Love and Learned how to Make love :P
Skinned our heart and Skinned our knees...
Good Bye my friend is hard to die
Pretty girls are everywhere... but whenever you were thinking of I was always be there
We had joy we had fun we had, Seasons in the sun
But the hills that we climbed were, Just seasons out of time ...
Hey My papa please pray for me
I was the black sheep of the family, and You tried to teach me right from wrong
Maybe Too much wine and too much dance... so Wonder how I got along....
Hey Good Bye Kathi My First Love
You gave me love and helped
And every time that I was down, You would always come around
And get my feet back on the ground
Little children everywhere ,When you see them I wanna be there.....
But This time my dear... I could make it and come around Because...
The wine and the song like, The seasons have all gone
Good Bye AGAIN and AGAIN My FIRST LOVE....Kathi Liebling!
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